Accepting autism when you just want what everyone else has.

I video popped up on my facebook timeline this evening. It’s a short promo for the tv show John Bishop, in coversation with….this weeks promo features Paddy Mcguinness talking about his child with autism. Something he admits he struggled to accept at the time of diagnosis.
He talks about seeing a kid pestering his dad in the supermarket and teh dad was dismissive of his son’s request for a yogurt. Paddy says he thought to himself how lucky that dissmissive father was to be able to have that kind of experience with his child. I know I’m not the only Autism parent who knows EXACTLY how Paddy feels!
Something as simple and mundane as shopping with the kids, an activity many parents actually dread due to the constant demands of their brood ‘chirping’ for all kinds of fgoodies, becomes a mamoth task full of stress for autistic families. At best you can get in grab what you need and get out with the occasional pang of envy at someone’s child whining about wanting a comic or crisps. At worst you have to abandon the shopping trolley mid aisle and leave via the nearest exit with half the store staring as you try to carry/drag your overwhelmed child outside.

Autism acceptance is growing all the time but I think it’s fair to say that even the most loving inclusive parent occasionally find themselves wishing life could be just a little more ‘normal’ whatever that means?
Simple things like hearing a child coming out of school and talking about their day is so hard for me to cope with. My boy is 6 years old and has never uttered a word other than repeating the mumumumum babble of a young baby. I never get to hear what he’s been up to in class or how he fell off the climbing frame and bumped his knee. I can only dream of having him pester me constantly to get his own way or tell me aboutr the jigsaw he did at school or simply ask for drink without me having to guess if he’s thirsy or not!
Autism acceptance is a wonderful thing, quiet shopping hours and the like unlock a huge range of opportunities for autistic children and adults to experience but I think it’s important to recognise how hard it can be for parents of children with autism to accept that this is the diagnosis for their child and that they might never get to have the experiences that ‘normal’ families will.

I am not ashamed to admit that I still have days where I struggle to accept that this is my life now. I know my husband does too. It doesn’t make us bad parents. It’s just part of the journey. I knew from a very early age that an ASD diagnosis was on the cards for my son. I was the one that pushed for an early assesment, against my GP’s argument that it was too early to tell. I fully expected the diagnosis we got at his assesment……that doesn’t mean it didn’t hit me like a brick wall and I didn’t cry in the car on the way home.
Sometimes accepting autism is hard…..even when you love that person completely.

I am looking forward to watching Paddy’s interview tomorrow evening and I know I won’t be the only sat blubbing into tissues as I relate to his struggles.

John bishop, in conversation with….Paddy Mcguinness airs on W channel at 10pm tomorrow (Thursday) night.

Now is your chance – I am proof a 30 day guide could change your life for the better.

This post contains affliiate links.

I shared a post a while back about how I get myself motivated on a Monday morning. (ICYMI it’s this one)
I developed my morning routine after some coaching with the amazing Niyc Pidgeon. Niyc is a Positive Psychologist MSc, Global Success Coach, and as of yesterday, a published Hay House Author!
I have just ordered her book Now Is Your Chance 
for myself and I am excited to get stuck into her 30-day guide.

Niyc Pidgeon Changed my life.
Niyc’s book is available now.

Having had actual real-life coaching from Niyc herself I can say from experience that the title: Now Is Your Chance: A 30-Day Guide to Living Your Happiest Life Using Positive Psychology isn’t
just a tagline to grab your attention. 30 Days of coaching with Niyc sent me off in a direction I never thought I would have the confidence to take!

I was struggling with my confidence in my network marketing business which was the reason I wanted to get involved with the coaching programme. What actually happened though was during the 30 days and working on the tasks Niyc set I realised it wasn’t just my business that was making me miserable. It was a whole bunch of things and the best bit was I was given the skills to re-evaluate what my goals were and how to make small changes to my life and my mindset to make those new, exciting goals far more reachable!

Following the simple steps, set out by Niyc, for 30 days gave me the tools I needed to shift my mindset into a more positive state. Don’t get me wrong I still have bad days, but there are definitely fewer of them now!

The shift in confidence saw me actaully take a step back from my Network marketing business and do something I had always dreamed of but had never been confident enough to do….Start a photography course and become a paid, professional, photographer!
So far it’s going pretty well too! 6 months in and I’ve had paid clients and new enquiries coming in regularly and I’ve even shot my first wedding (which was terrifying, but ultimately successful!)

It was a twist I never saw coming to be honest but I’m now doing something I love and getting paid for it and I truely believe it was down to Niyc’s coaching. It was the catalyst I needed to change my thinking and change my life for the better.

I can’t wait to get my hands on my copy tomorrow becasue I know it’s going to cement the habits I’ve already gained from coaching sessions in the past and if you take the chance to order a copy I’d love to know what you think and if it changes your life too!

B x

 

 

 

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