Despite being able to send Pud to the year group I wanted to (Here’s the post about that particular fight) today is still a sad day for me.
Pud is off to his first day of school!
All mums have worries about their precious babies starting this huge new chapter of their lives but as with most other milestones in life there is a special level of worrying reserved for us special needs families.
There are the usual worries of course. Will they miss me? Will they make friends? Will they be able to keep up with their peers?……..and the list goes on.
But for me at least I have an extra level of worring to do. How will he cope in a completely new scenario and new routine? Will the staff be able to understand his subtle gestures and his own personal way of signing for what he wants? What happens if he gets bullied? Will they know when he is hurt? Will he make it through the day without needing a nap from all the stimulation? Will they help him with his lunch and watch that he doesn’t try to take others lunches and cause a fight?
These are just some of the things that will be running through my mind until 3 pm.
The thing is when most kids come out of school they will tell you all about their day. For me, I have to find out through his 1:1 and if she doesn’t see something or doesn’t tell me, then I will never know! It’s a lot of faith to put in someone that you’ve only met briefly for a couple of times!
The first day is usually the most stressful. I know when M started school, the relief that flooded over me when she came out at home time, beaming smile on her face and excited to tell me al the wonderful things she had done that she would be ok.
With Pud though the worries won’t end today. Every single day is going to be as hard and as worrying as the first. That’s probably one of the crappiest sides of being an Autism parent ( or any other special needs parent come to that!) Autism doesn’t take a day of so neither can I.
As it happens, today he seemed to have a really good day! So that will make tomorrow slightly easier to take. The fact he came in home and straight away put himself to bed tells me the end of the week is going to be a struggle! 🙁
Watch this space….. I suspect a meltdown is on the way! (For Pud and for me!)